Self Harm
N.B. Be careful as some of the following might be a trigger so always be safe and secure before you start reading.
'It is not natural, it is not right and it produces nothing good.'
Well actually that is someone said about homosexuality but it sort of fits in with peoples opinion on this too. People think it is sick, they pity me. But they just don't understand. I am not going to say that self harm is perhaps the most mentally stable part of my life but it did fulfil it's purpose a lot better than the alternatives.
However the reason I mention it is that I don't want anyone to feel alone as I did when I was doing it and thinking myself the only one to be this fucked up, also I want people to recognise it and not be afraid of talking about it. Self harm is just like bulimia, anorexia, eating disorders generally really. Except that it is not quite as fashionable and there can be a little more blood. However, I like to think that is a safer form of expression. Self harm is not suicide for me. I want people to notice it and ask me about my wounds. Never shy away, as long as you ask sensible questions then that is fine. It is ok not to know how to deal with it, but I wont be offended by sensible, guilt-free queries.
Yes I hated myself, and I wouldn't have done it if I didn't. And I intially hated myself more because I did it, and then I realised that self harm was my safety value. Without it I would never have survived. My heart felt thanks go out to Laura, who took me in from the cold (and it was a cold day) and showed me that I wasn't alone, whether she meant to or not.
Anyway for your delight I have included a little article Laura and I wrote for our University's Women's Book and a few links for those who want to know more.
