Jeff Tracy: Incoming message from Thunderbird 5. (John Tracy appears on the screen).
John Tracy: Dad, you there? There is one mutha of a meteor headin' for New York City! Wut the hell are we gonna do? Surely we are all gonna die!
Jeff Tracy: John, no-one is going to die...and don't call me Shirley! What can we do about this, Brains?
Brains: What? You mean it's not good enough for me to walk round here being the handsomest guy on the planet, and getting all the chicks to come and see this movie four times? I gotta come up with some kind of plan to knock out this meteor thing? First, you nearly drown me in Titanic...it's all too much! I'm going to my dressing room! (exits)
Jeff Tracy: What a day to give up acting! Come in Thunderbird One. Come in Thunderbird One! (Scott Tracy appears on the screen. He is holding a microphone to his lips)
Scott Tracy: (Sings) A-a-a-a-s I, as I wander through this world, nuthin' can stop me, the Duke of Earl...Oh! Hi, Dad! We got a problem?
Jeff Tracy: You bet your fat, er, sweet ass we got a problem. Launch Thunderbird one! Now!
Scott Tracy: Right away, Dad. Just as soon as I finish this song...
Jeff Tracy: NOW, GODDAMIT!!!
Scott Tracy: Okay, Dad...gettin' you loud and clear. Why didn't you say it was urgent? On my way! (Scott heaves his bulk out of his chair and heads for the chute to slide down to Thunderbird One)
Jeff Tracy: Thunderbird Two. Come in, Thunderbird Two! (Virgil and Gordon appear on the screen)
Virgil Tracy: Waddya want, ya goddam horse manure smellin' motherfu - Oh, hi, Dad! How ya doin'?
Jeff Tracy: Virgil, I want you and Gordon to evacuate New York City.
Virgil Tracy: What is it, Pops?
Jeff Tracy: It's a big place full of millions of people and skyscrapers. And there's a giant meteor headed straight for it!
Virgil Tracy: Holy shit! Are you screwin' me Pops? Wadda we gonna do, Gordon?
Gordon Tracy: Aye-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-a-a-a-allrighty then!! We've got to evacuate New York right away...before it ends up Sssssssssssssmoking!!
Jeff Tracy: Get to it, you guys. New York is relying on you.
Gordon Tracy: F.A.B., Dad!
Virgil Tracy: F.A.B.? What does that stand for? Fu- (the screen closes down)
Jeff Tracy: (to himself) I'd better notify Lady Penelope. The Prime Minister will have to be told about this. (picks up the microphone) Come in, Lady Penelope..... (Lady Penelope and Parker appear on the screen)
Lady Penelope: Yeah...who is it?
Jeff Tracy: It's me, Lady Penelope, Jeff Tracy. You've got to tell the PM, Penelope. There's a giant meteor heading for New York!
Lady Penelope: Meteor, schmeeteor! I gotta go get in my groceries for the weekend!
Parker: A giant meteor's gonna hit New York City? Git the f--- outa here!
Jeff Tracy: It's not only going to hit New York City. It could wipe out all life on the face of the planet!
Parker: Git the f--- outa here! (The screen changes. It's Scott Tracy)
Scott Tracy: Dad? You know you asked me to launch Thunderbird One?
Jeff Tracy: Ye-e-e-s?
Scott Tracy: Well, I'm stuck in the chute.
Jeff Tracy: What a day to give up those strings that used to hold me up! (collapses on the floor)