THE BRIDES OF GOD

Scene: a nunnery in the Lake District

NOVICE A Indian, young.

NOVICE B English, young, naive

NUN Middle-aged, homely.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Intellectual, middle-aged, enlightened.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Intense, middle-aged, dogmatic.

Novice A and Nun are peeling potatoes, sitting with plastic bowls on their laps

NOVICE A I'm cold! I'm cold! I'm cold!

NUN Come along, dear, you can't be. It's just the way you're feeling.

NOVICE A What's the month?

NUN I beg your pardon, dear?

NOVICE A What's the month?

NUN Oooh....July, yes, that's right, Pentecost has gone, and it's that big gap where nothing special happens until Harvest Time, when the Father always asks us for runner beans, and they're terribly stringy, but he says it doesn't matter, they're just the first-fruits for the church and no one'll eat them, but they're actually the last of the crop...

NOVICE A It's supposed to be summer, isn't it?

NUN I beg your pardon?

NOVICE A July - it's one of your summer months, isn't it? I remember from school -And in July the gentle heat Will make the corn grow round and sweet.

NUN That's nice.

NOVICE A What's nice?

NUN The poem.

NOVICE A The month isn't. I haven't seen his face once.

NUN Whose face, dear? You're not supposed to see men's faces, you know, that's what being in a nunnery means. Giving up that kind of thing.

NOVICE A I haven't seen the sun's face.

NUN The sun's an it, dear, not a he. Not in England.

NOVICE A But why do you call it summer, when there isn't any sun!

NUN Oh, but there is sometimes, dear. Sometimes there's a lot of it.

NOVICE A But not in the summer.

NUN No. Well, yes. And then again, sometimes - no.

NOVICE A When we have summer, you can see him all day. He's so bright and so fierce, he burns his way through your eyelids. You don't even believe that he goes away at night. You lie on the ground and you can still feel him there, pushing into you out of the baked earth. You lean against the wall of your house, and there he is, touching your back, making the pain go away. Why don't you have real seasons, with a real sun?

NUN Well, dear, I'm sure it wouldn't do for all the countries in the world to be just the same, now, would it, any more than it would do for all the people in the world to be just the same. God decided to give your country a lot of sun, and He gave us a bit less, and probably a bit more rain, just to make up. There are people that like rain, you know. Fishermen. My father was a fisherman. An angler.

NOVICE A We wrapped the fresh fish in palm-leaves and cooked it in hot ashes on the beach. We made fires out of driftwood.

NUN Yes, well, my father never actually seemed to catch anything. My mother used to think he went fishing to avoid the washing-up. Or to avoid her. He took my brother. But he never took me. I just did the washing-up. And listened to my mother. They always went out straight after lunch. Even when it was raining.

NOVICE A Could we have some hot water?

NUN What, dear?

NOVICE A Hot water! To wash the potatoes. My hands are so cold I'll cut myself and not notice. I can't feel my fingers.

NUN Hot water...hmm...I don't know what the Mother Superior would say. She doesn't like turning on the immersion at all. In the winter, when the heating's on, it doesn't notice, and we have to have the heating to stop the damp in the chapel, the architect said, and that's why, but in the summer, I really don't know what she'd say.

NOVICE A Half a kettle. We could make some tea, and pour the rest into the potato-water.

NUN We had tea after lunch. I don't think we're really allowed any more...

NOVICE A Is that one of the laws?

NUN What do you mean, dear?

NOVICE A Laws. Rules. What we must do. What we mustn't do. Like not seeing men.

NUN No, dear, it's not really one of those. It's just - habit. Just - practice. It's learning not to pay so much attention to what your body wants. That way, you can hear your spirit more clearly.

NOVICE A What I hear is my stomach rumbling.

NUN Hush, dear! I know it's only a joke, and you're still only a novice, but there are some things you just don't joke about. Knowing what to say and what not to say, knowing what to think and what not to think - it's all part of being a good wife.

NOVICE A A good wife to whom? That's not what I'm being trained for, is it?

NUN Of course it is, dear. You're being trained to be the Bride of God. We're all the Brides of God, and we have to keep His house clean and tidy and be obedient to His will, which is why we shouldn't grumble about the weather, because the weather is His gift to us.

NOVICE A If I had an earthly husband who made me peel potatoes in freezing cold water, I'd leave him.

BLACKOUT

Mother Superior A, working at her desk. Nun submissively asking her:

NUN And is it all right about the second blanket?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Sister, you are in charge of domestic matters, as I am in charge of spiritual ones. If you think it appropriate, then I am sure it will be so. In any case, surely this is a matter for my co-abbess? Have you spoken to her?

NUN I'm afraid I couldn't find her, but if I have your approval, Reverend Mother, then that'll be all right.

As she leaves, and Mother Superior A resumes writing, B enters.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Another lengthy disquisition on blocked sinks, I imagine.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A (without looking up) As it happens, no.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B The vegetable garden, then.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A (still not looking up) Neither slugs nor snails formed the matter of her discourse.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B (looking at what Mother A is writing) The accounts?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A The accounts. The lilies of the fields neither toiled nor span nor had they to pay electricity bills

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Nor would we, if this were a civilised country that had the slightest regard for religion.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A I am happy to render unto Caesar what is Caesar's.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Not happy. Obliged.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A I do not find it so easy as you to do to exempt myself from the demands of ordinary life.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Perhaps the flame of spirituality burns less brightly in you than in some others in our order.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A I think that is the kind of explanation and apologia that I should have been permitted to offer for myself.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Does it matter where truth comes from, so long as it arrives?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A When I was still in the world, I read William Blake: A truth told with a bad intent Beats all the lies you can invent.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B There are many other writings of his which I am sure you are now ashamed to have read.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A If I had the leisure to remember them, perhaps.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Oh, I'm sure you used to browse in them when you were preparing your talks for the radio.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Maybe. Among many other things. Some of which might be considered as corrupting. But I never felt corrupted, or even in danger of so being. My faith and my intelligence strengthened me.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Are you sure you weren't too proud?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Proud of what?

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Of your cleverness. Proud of the fact that they all listened to you.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Did they? I never knew. I just spoke to a microphone. I spoke for exactly as long as they told me, and then I stopped.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B A model broadcaster. I can just imagine.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A I know there were letters, because they told me. But I never knew how many, because they were delivered to the Bishop's office and answered by his staff. I suppose they didn't want me to get too involved in the world.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B I saw the car you used to drive to the studio.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A It was the car that belonged to the convent.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B A London convent. I notice you're less satisfied driving the one that belongs to us.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A The steering is sloppy, the exhaust has almost rusted through, and using the gear-box is like poking a coal-fire to make it flame.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Aren't you being just a little worldly?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Being unworldly does not mean one that has to put up with rubbish or that one should abdicate one's critical faculties. I'm not talking about status symbols and styling. I'm talking about things that serve their purpose and are competently made.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Like good food.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A One of the glories of God is undoubtedly the variety of vegetables He has made and the variety of ways in which He has inspired us to cook them. It is for that reason, rather than to gratify my own fleshly appetites, that I insist on occasionally having something other than mashed potatoes and boiled cabbage.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Have you ever considered that you may be deceiving yourself?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A When I took the vows that bound me as a bride to God, I also made the assumption that He, as a husband, would want the best for me.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Are you sure that you're competent to judge what's best?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A With His guidance, yes.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B As you will know, I'm afraid I have to disagree with you, quite frequently. As far as I'm concerned, the major qualification for anything to have merit is that it should serve religion in some way.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A As you will know, I think there more ways of serving God. In particular, I detest that monstrous piece of wall-painting in our church which you are so determined to preserve. I find it vulgar, sentimental and offensive.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Nothing that is honestly meant to glorify God can ever be any of those things. The qualities you have named inhere in our all too human capacities for judgement. The sublime subject will always ennoble inadequate execution. I need to use the calor-gas heater.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A I have so far acquiesced in the ruinously expensive additional electric heating of the church throughout the winter in order to prevent the deterioration of what is after all only an image, and a particularly mediocre one at that, but we are now in July -

MOTHER SUPERIOR B A particularly cold and wet July in the Lake District - While you and I, Reverend Mother, are capable of subduing the flesh and can withstand climatic rigours, I am afraid the wall-painting in the chapel absolutely requires a higher temperature for its preservation.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A You will find the heater in my lodging.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B I'll have it fetched.

BLACKOUT

Novices A and B are cleaning silver

NOVICE A Do you want to be married?

NOVICE B What? But I'm not - I mean - that's why I'm taking the veil.

NOVICE A But you are getting married, you know. To God. That's what they all keep on saying.

NOVICE B Ye-es. But it's not like - I mean - there's nothing -

NOVICE A Carnal. That's the word you're looking for. Carnal. To do with the flesh. Like carnivore. Flesh-eater. Meat-eater. I expect you're not one of those, either.

NOVICE B When I have to - to be sociable - I mean, you don't want to stick out in a crowd - but - no - given the choice, I wouldn't - and here, well, I am given the choice. At home, I wouldn't have been. It put me off my food. All my food. My dad liked steaks, you know. Big ones. Thick ones. Raw. Well - almost raw. Running with blood. My mum - sometimes - sometimes, she had to put 'em on her eyes, you know, when he'd been knocking her about.

NOVICE A That's what meat does. Stirs up the blood. Carnal. Carnivore.

NOVICE B You know a lot about English. Considering it's not your language.

NOVICE A We had a mission-school in the village. We were lucky. I suppose. I was the best at it. Perhaps that's why they chose me.

NOVICE B Chose you? To be a bride of God?

NOVICE A To be a bride of your god.

NOVICE B Our god? Your god!

NOVICE A Your god. I was already going to be a bride of our god.

NOVICE B Your god?

NOVICE A Siva. Siva. Siva. Siva. As she says his name, she bows to the four quarters. The dancer. The dancer with the fiery arms. The dance itself. He was going to gather me up to him. In me. On me. Round me. Through me. She has turned through the four quarters again. One with me. She closes her eyes.

NOVICE B Careful! You'll drop things! You'll break them!

NOVICE A her eyes still closed For a moment there, I thought I could see him. Coming for me. She opens her eyes. What will it be like when your god comes for us?

NOVICE B Sorry?

NOVICE A The bridegroom comes for his bride. He - takes her. That's the way it is with men. That's the way it is with gods. He takes her. Maybe suddenly, like the lightning. Maybe slowly, like the rain. Laying the dust. Piercing the ground. Drop by drop.

NOVICE B God takes us when we die.

NOVICE A That's what it feels like. That's what everybody says it feels like. Dying. Dying. All the strength leaving you in one huge shudder. And then you come back to life, tingling all over.

NOVICE B At the end of the world. On Judgement Day. When the wicked are punished, and the good are rewarded, and the just shall be seated on the right hand of God Almighty, as He comes in glory.

NOVICE A I want to be alone with him. I don't want to wait till the end of the world. I want it now. I'm ready. I'm the age to be a bride. I was promised. But your god offered more money.

NOVICE B What?

NOVICE A You always have more money. You buy us. Body and soul. Yes. Even the soul. Especially if I have to wait for ever and ever amen for your god to take me. By then, I shan't be worth taking. Dried and withered. That's what I'll be. Shrunk and shrivelled. Dessiccated. He ought to come and take me now.

NOVICE B I don't know what you're talking about. God is always with us. Always. I can feel Him now.

NOVICE A Where?

NOVICE B What do you mean, "where"?

NOVICE A Where about your body? In your legs? In your arms? In your breasts?

NOVICE B No! No!! In my mind! In my heart! I can feel Him, I tell you, I can feel Him!

NOVICE A And what's he like? Hot or cold?

NOVICE B Neither.

NOVICE A Hot or cold?

NOVICE B It's not like that!

NOVICE A You're lying. You're fooling yourself. You can't feel him at all.

NOVICE B Yes I can! Yes I can!

NOVICE A No you can't. Your god isn't like that. But I can feel my god. Oh yes. I know where to touch myself so I can feel him. If I put my arms round myself she does so then they become his arms, and he embraces me. And if I touch myself in a secret place, then I feel him touching me there. It burns. It burns. It flares and flames inside me, until all of me is on fire. And then I die. That's what it's like. I die. And then I'm reborn. And everything's fresh again.

NOVICE B slowly and deliberately I know what you mean, and it's a sin. I shouldn't know about it, but I do, and I've confessed it and I've been forgiven, and I know it's a sin, and if you don't confess it, and you die, then you'll go straight to hell, and you'll deserve to, because you aren't in the least bit contrite and you won't admit it's a sin, and that's the blackest sin of all, and you're saying you enjoy it, and you're still saying you enjoy it and that's even worse.

NOVICE A standing up, becoming first ecstatic and then delirious I'm hot. I'm so hot. I'm burning. I'm burning up. I'm on fire. She collapses in a faint, spilling cutlery everywhere with a ferocious clatter.

BlACKOUT

NOVICE B Is she ill? I mean, is she really ill?

NUN shaking down a thermometer She has a very high temperature, that's all I can say.

NOVICE B That probably explains it, then.

NUN What?

NOVICE B All the things she was saying.

NUN Aha. She is wiping the thermometer and putting it away.

NOVICE B Don't you want to know?

NUN What?

NOVICE B What she said. It was very odd.

NUN I expect it was. People do say funny things when they're ill. Delirium, that's what they call it.

NOVICE B Ye-es. But it did sort of make sense, somehow.

NUN That's strange. It doesn't usually. I remember nursing my mother, and the things she said didn't make any sense at all. Really, I wish I hadn't had to listen to any of them.

NOVICE A offstage I'm cold! I'm cold! I'm cold!

NOVICE B How can she say she's cold, when we know how hot she is?

NUN It's the way she feels, dear.

NOVICE B Ye-es. But we know better.

NOVICE A offstage I'm cold! I'm cold! I'm cold! I need the sun! Where is he?

NOVICE B Do you think she'll go on like that all night?

NUN I'm afraid she may, while the fever lasts.

NOVICE B Isn't there anything we can do?

NUN Sponge her down. Help her to sweat. Keep her warm.

NOVICE B It's not easy to keep warm here, is it? I mean - it's not that important, being comfortable in the body, if you're comfortable in your mind - in your soul, I mean -

NUN No, it isn't, dear, but we still owe some respect to the body, because He gave it to us, so we ought to look after it, so why don't you go and see if there's anything you can do for the poor girl -

NOVICE B Oh, no - I don't think - she might start talking that way again -

NUN If she does, then you just don't listen.

NOVICE B Yes, but I -

NUN You just don't listen. I'm sure there have been other things in your life that you haven't listened to.

NOVICE B Well -

NUN Exactly. Now, I'm going to go and tell Reverend Mother what's happened, and if the poor girl falls asleep, or you feel you can get away, I'd like you to take the calor-gas heater from Reverend Mother's lodging and set it up in the church, by the wall-painting.

NOVICE B But that's -

NUN I've learned not to argue, dear, and that's something you'll have to do, too. Obedience, that's what they call it. Now run along and do as you're told.

Exit Novice B. Enter Mother Superior A.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Is everything all right?

NUN I'm afraid not, Reverend Mother. The new novice, the one from India, has fallen ill.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Oh dear.

NUN A fever, I'm afraid.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Oh dear.

NUN A very high temperature. If it hasn't fallen by morning, then I'm afraid we shall have to call the doctor.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Hmmm. I'm sure you know best. Please tell me if anything - tell me.

NUN Very good, Reverend Mother.

Exit Nun. Enter Mother Superior B.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A She's ill.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Who is?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A The new girl. I knew it wasn't a good idea.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B What wasn't?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Flying her in. Importing her. All through that dreadful drive down to Heathrow and back, I had this feeling that it was completely wrong.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B And what was wrong about it? Another soul for our flock? Was that wrong? Another human being to strengthen our prayers? Was that wrong?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A She's not from our culture.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Culture? Culture? That's all you think about! Faith is what matters. She abides by our faith. She believes the same things we do.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Are you sure?

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Of course. Otherwise she wouldn't have been sent to us.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Sent to us?

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Recommended to us.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Sent to us. Like a parcel. Like something we ordered from a catalogue. Not a person at all. Just someone to make up the numbers.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Don't be foolish. I'm sure she agreed to come here.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Wanted to come here? No. Agreed. I wonder what else she agreed to? Did any money change hands?

MOTHER SUPERIOR B I think you have to realise that in those cultures a child is necessarily regarded as a source of income, as an asset to the family. If you take that child away, then the family expects some kind of recompense.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A We bought her.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Not at all. We compensated her family for the loss of her work-power and earning ability.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A They sold her to us. They sold her.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B I don't know why the concept of people being bought and sold should upset you so much. We have been bought back from eternal damnation. And you know what the price was that was paid.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A I'm afraid I consider the comparison blasphemous. The correct analogy for me is those men who purchase Filipino wives by mail-order. I hadn't realised that God was supposed to acquire His brides in the same way.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B You're distorting the entire transaction. The girl believes. She can say her creed. She's been baptised. She's been confirmed.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A She comes from an alien culture. And she's probably brought a tropical disease with her. Unless it's this climate that's undermined her health in the past fortnight.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Don't be absurd. It's probably just a summer cold. And you talk of alien cultures as if it was only white Europeans like you and me that had the right to be saved by the blood of Christ. The girl knows exactly what she's doing. You heard her English - considerably better than most natives of this country.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A That only proves she's an excellent linguist. It says nothing about her religious convictions. I know the scorn you have for the study of comparative religion, but even you must realise how improbable it is that she genuinely believes what she has been taught to say.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B That, I think, is where we differ. You have a vein of intellectual scepticism which any good spiritual advisor should have encouraged you to excise long since. Because your faith is weak, and your intellect strong, you are impressed by people who believe, even - no - especially - when what they believe is radically different from your own faith. You accord those beliefs a respect which they do not deserve, and which you would certainly not give them if you examined them with that intellect of which you are so proud.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A And you, of course, are tolerant, understanding, open and ecumenical.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B I respect faith. I honour belief. I despise as wrong and misguided those things in which such people believe, but I respect their actual faith, their mental and spiritual commitment. Believe me, it will always be easier to turn a strong faith towards Christ than it is to create a strong faith in Christ out of a vacuum. How do you think it was possible for the Early Fathers to convert all those pagans? Because they believed in trees and stones. Deeply. Truly. Believed.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A They believed in images, in objects, in fantastic semi-animals. That's magic. That isn't religion. Religion is when you see through the symbols. When you know they aren't literally true, but just ways of talking about God. God doesn't have eight arms or an elephant's head. He has qualities that human beings have to picture in those ways.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Your head always gets in the way. You have to understand. You can't just feel. That's what those talks on the radio were all about: explaining away what you couldn't feel, though everyone else could. Your god's in your head, and not in your heart. No wonder you became so worldly that they sent you here.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Worldly! What nonsense!

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Oh, you fooled yourself. You rationalised it all. Intelligent people, you said, are not bound by such laws, which are only made for the stupid, who can't see through them to the deeper meaning.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A There are certain aspects, mostly prohibitive, which, it is generally acknowledged, belong to an earlier stage of cultural development and therefore stand out as increasingly inappropriate anachronisms.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Only the clever can be so stupid! Those rules are the essential things! They help us to triumph over our mere humanity! Are we afraid of pain? Then let us learn not to be! Not just avoid it! You are entirely out of touch with ordinary people who believe. People who believe that the divine can intervene in their lives. Their faith can still bring about miracles, unlike your washed-out intellectualism.Your god is a mere notion, a theory, an idea. Mine is truly my bridegroom, my lover, and my friend. And that's why all representations of Him are sacred. A picture of the beloved is a picture of the beloved - who cares if it's out of focus?. I'm going to make sure that calor-gas heater has been put in the chapel.

Exit Mother Superior B. Enter Novice B.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A And how is our patient?

NOVICE B I'm afraid she isn't very patient, Reverend Mother.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Oh dear.

NOVICE B She keeps on getting out of bed and dancing round the room, and then she falls down in a faint. And all the time she's talking and talking and talking, so wildly and strangely that it makes my head go round. I don't want to listen and I try not to listen, but some of it goes in whatever I do. I asked Sister to go in and see if she couldn't calm her down - but she said she was busy in the garden, had to do things before it started to rain. So then I went back - but she was worse than ever, seeing things that weren't there, saying she's hot, saying she's cold - calling out to him, saying she's ready, why doesn't he come for her, why doesn't he take her in his arms of fire -

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Calling out to whom?

NOVICE B God. God.

Enter Mother Superior B in a rush

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Obedience! Obedience! Where is the calor-gas heater? Why is it not in the chapel?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Moderate yourself!

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Orders are given to be carried out. Discipline. Discipline.

NOVICE B She was cold. She said she was cold. I had to do it. Fire. She said she needed fire.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B Need? Who is she to say what she needs?

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Surely you will acknowledge that a live human being is more important than a mere image?

MOTHER SUPERIOR B No. Dishonouring the image is dishonouring God Himself. Do you not remember the disciple who objected because ointment was poured on the feet of Christ? He said it should have been sold and the money given to the poor. And Christ replied, "The poor you have always with you. Me you have but for a little time."

MOTHER SUPERIOR A I find your comparison blasphemous.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B If she's cold, let her wait to become warm again. It'll happen.

There is an enormous explosion. Enter Nun, breathless.

NUN I saw her. I saw her before it happened. I couldn't reach her. I was in the garden, and I looked up, and I saw her through the window. She was dancing round, waving her arms, and she seemed to be smiling and crying out in joy. But when I looked properly, her arms were all on fire and there were flames leaping up around her, embracing her. And then I thought she must be screaming, and that's why her mouth was open, screaming. I ran - to get help - to reach her - I don't know what - and then there was the explosion. I think she must be dead. And I couldn't get near for the heat and the flames.

NOVICE B He came for her.

MOTHER SUPERIOR A Yes, I am sure God came for her. I hope this terrible tragedy will not shake anyone's faith in God.

MOTHER SUPERIOR B On the contrary. Mine has been strengthened by the way this young girl met her death in this regrettable accident. Like a true martyr. Like a real bride of god.

NUN Reverend Mothers - have I your permission to call the Fire Brigade?

FINAL BLACKOUT