The Bull with the Golden Guts

Ridgeway Path
Goodbye Humanosaurus
Space Wray
Rocket
Goosey Goosey
Blue Beret
Zonked Right Out (On Life)
My Train is Coming
Child Crusade
Difficult Age
Was a Yes (extract)
No One Here Available
Don't You Ever Dare Call Me Chickenhead
Everything
This is the End

A Collection of Andy Partridge Home Demos
Cassette-only, The Little Express, LE 03

Thanks to Dave Franson for his transcription efforts.

Ridgeway Path

[instrumental]

Goodbye Humanosaurus

Just take your suitcase from my wardrobe
And pack it full of guns and bombs
Then CFC's and germ-war microbes
We've been destroying stuff too long
And there's no home for us
Just you raise your voice in chorus
Goodbye humanosaurus

They'll teach at schools we were cold-blooded
And that we spoke and threw a turd
How we all drowned as litter flooded
We treated Earth like it was dirt
And so I must implore us
Don't go near that exit door-us (Doris)
Goodbye humanosaur
Be no more us

They were big with brains the size of a [burger bap]
History has got 'em down as a homo sap
All that now remains
Are the overgrown fast lanes
And junk food cartons
They'd adore us if we'd just sweep up the floor-us
Goodbye humanosaur
Clean the shore
No more war
Humanosaurus

Space Wray

[instrumental]

Rocket

Cape Canaveral Florida, ready for takeoff stages
Zoom destination an isolated planet Mars
On which observed many relics of past ages
On return despite rocks no spars

2nd destination world's largest planet Jupiter
From there obtained some ancient relics
When returned at base -- we want Hoopiter!
And we would like some fancy cow's milk

3rd destinations many ringed planet Saturn
While there darted among the rings
At base had a few thoughts of astral matter
Again at base a welcoming with sings

4th zoom destination to an isolated planet Neptune
Whose surface was clear of any vegetation
At base quote -- would like large dirigible balloon
During when there was no hesitation

5th zoom destination smallest planet Pluto
On which there are many beautiful sights
It has no vegetation you know
No power to illuminate dark nights.

Goosey Goosey

Hey goosey goosey
I believe it's for having fun
Hey goosey goosey
I believe it's for everyone.

One red morning
With no warning
Life comes crashing in
To wake you early with its golden din.

One blue evening
Cruelly leaving
It goes breezing out
The very second that you figure it out
What it's all for.

Everybody has a magic lantern
Everybody has an inner eye
Everybody has a magic carpet
Seems a shame if you don't let it fly
Tell you why

Hey goosey goosey...

Some bright daytime
Worker's playtime
You get country-bound
Pick your girl up
So you're all pinned down

Some dark nighttime
Final frighttime
As the reaper knocks
The wisdom of the ancients in a box
But it's too late

Everybody has a magic lantern...

Hey goosey goosey...

Yes I do

Blue Beret

Life is sometimes shorter than you think
So take yourself a hike from the kitchen sink
Me, I like to roam
Wasn't built in a day
And night throws the stars in our way
Meanwhile on Planet Earth

Some people are dying for the right to say
Some people are dying 'cause the other people busy blowing them away
Well, we're all dying so we better have a ton of fun along the way
I say hats off, get your hats off, take your hats off, get your hats off
For the blue beret
Blue beret, blue beret

The wind has blown it off his head
And sent it spinning straight to nowhere
Nowhere to get ahead in this life

Life is sometimes longer than you need
Especially if it's thrown away on hate and greed
Well, me I like to think while the other fish swim
But sharks made a meal out of him
Meanwhile on bone dry land

Some people are dying for the right to say
Some people just want the right to say
Some people are dying 'cause the other people busy blowing them away
Some people are merely blown away
Well, we're all dying so we better have a ton of fun along the way
I say hats off, take your hats off, get your hats off, take your hats off
To the blue beret
Blue beret, blue beret

The wind has blown it off his head
And sent it spinning straight to nowhere
Nowhere to get ahead in this life
So just love your dog and don't kick your wife
Put down that knife, watch out the windows,
And blow your hat away

Zonked Right Out (On Life)

Zonked right out HA HA

Won't you bop on over little Charlie, won't you [bop]
Won't you bop on over with the move and don't you stop
It's za bees, za bows, zabaglio
That gets the feelin' makes the world go go

Zonked right out HA HA on life

I could tell you how to be a happy person
All you do is throw yourself in love

My Train is Coming

My train is coming
I can see it up the line
My train is coming
And what's on it's all mine

My train is coming
I can hear it up the track
My train is coming
Bringing sugar time back

Oh little darling
Since you've gone I've been so sad and blue
Little darling
If you come home I'll be good to you

Got to get it while it's here
That's a lesson that is clear
Got to get it while it's here
And I hear

My train is coming
I can see it up the line
My train is coming
And what's on it's all mine

Little darling
Since you've gone I realized I'm wrong
Little darling
Ride that railroad back where you belong

Got to get it while it's here...

My train is coming
I can see it up the line
My train is coming
And it's right back on time

My train is coming
What I did is a crime
My train is coming
And what's on it's all mine

Child Crusade

[instrumental]

Difficult Age

Difficult age
You're just fourteen
And you're not friends with your body
Painfully thin
Look at your skin
Play with yourself for a hobby

How can they love a man who does that to himself?

Difficult age
Turn on the page
Have that wee drink in the meantime

Difficult age
Now you're eighteen
Here's all the freedoms you wanted
All the best clothes
A looker who goes
The size of your wage packet flaunted

How can they love a man who does that to himself?

Difficult age
Turn on the page
And have that wee drink in the meantime

Difficult age
He's twenty-nine
Thirty just lurks 'round the corner
Settled for life
Nice kids and wife
Pull out a plum like Jack Horner

Difficult age
Turn on the page
Have that wee drink in the meantime

Difficult age
Now thirty-eight
And you're not friends with your body
Wish you were thin
Look at your skin
Wasting yourself for a hobby

How can they love a man who does that to himself?

Was a Yes (extract)

Here comes my neck
And here comes the axe
Covered my ears
Scared of the facts

I never dreamt that that was the answer I'd hear
I've been clocking up the courage to ask you all year
Now I'm really punchy with success

Because her answer was yes
To every little question I could ask her
Why her answer was yes
The pessimist in me expects disaster
But her answer was yes

Here comes my hand
Here

No One Here Available

No one here available right now
Please leave your name and your number
Leave your name and your number we'll get back to you somehow
We're busy workin'!
No one here available right now
Please leave your message after the tone

Don't You Ever Dare Call Me Chickenhead

Don't you ever dare call me chickenhead
Don't you ever dare
Don't you ever dare call me chickenhead
Nobody has ever lived that ever did
Nobody has ever lived.

Everything

Everything, everything, everything
We ever thought or said
Went in a box labeled "Us" on a shelf
In the back of your head

Everything, everything, everything
We ever shared or did
Stored in a jar which I swear had "True Love"
Pencilled in on the lid

Now you're saying, now you're saying, now you're saying
That you just don't love me anymore
Has there been a thief in your storehouse
Stealing away your memories?

Everything

Everything, everything, everything
We ever dreamt or planned
You tell me just blew away like
Confetti from some opened hand

Everything, everything, everything
You say you felt for me
Is it all dust and denial
As lifeless as some lunar sea?

Now you're saying, now you're saying, now you're saying
That you just don't love me anymore
Has there been a thief in your storehouse
Stealing away all our memories?

And did he latch your locks
And make your bells ring?
And did you let him in
To steal away what we had together?

Just everything

Now you're saying...

Everything

This is the End

This is the end
This is the end
This is the part where all the curtains come down
And they won't drop Fat Boy on your town
But if they do I hope it's not a trend

This is the end
This is the end
This is the reel where all the titles come up
And you have no more drink in your cup
So here's where sweet and bitter rivers blend

This is the end
Of all the bread we broke together
This is the end
Of all that fine and misty weather

I don't want to hear you've been crying
I don't want to hear you've been trying to revive it
Let it go
Let it lay down
Let it go
And if it won't stay down that's the surest sign
That something new's beginning

This is the end
This is the end
This is the part where all the lights flicker on
And we can see the popcorn is gone
Off looking for new causes to defend

This is the end
This is the end
That mythical place where everybody shakes hands
No hard feelings and no hard glands
The Bible says it's when cats and dogs make friends

This is the end
Of all the Wars of all the Roses
This is the end
Of kissing ass and rubbing noses

I don't want to hear you've been sorry
I don't want to hear you've been worrying about me
Let it die
Let it lay down
Let it die
So it'll all break down to rotten
That's the way we grow new flowers

This is the end
This is the end
Now this is where the screen has led us all to
A sign that says "Please start here anew"
So let me hear the violins all rend