XTC Demos

Quicksilver
Shaving Brush Boogie
Pupil Haze
Community Worker Breakdown/Whole Lotta Age
Orange Dust
Orange Dust Slight Return
Silver Sewing Machine
Holding the Baby
Pearl
Monkeys in Human-Skin Suits
Raising A Family In A House Full Of Mice
Now We're All Dead (Jacob's Ladder)
Susan Revolving
Nicely, Nicely Jane
Spare A Penny
Gangway Electric Guitar
Where Did the Ordinary People Go?
It Didn't Hurt A Bit
Then She Appeared
Wonder Annual
All I Dream Of Is A Friend
Everything'll Be All Right
Don't Let Us Bug Ya
The Stinking Rich Song
Your Dictionary
The Green Man
Knights in Shining Karma
You And The Clouds Will Still Be Beautiful
I'd Like That
I'm The Man Who Murdered Love
River Of Orchids
Church of Women
Easter Theatre
The Last Balloon
Dame Fortune
I Can't Own Her

This file contains miscellaneous lyrics to demo versions of XTC songs.
These songs have not been released or were re-recorded and possibly
rewritten when they were released.

Quicksilver

[transcribed by Naoyuki Isogai]

Quicksilver, headed out for the creed
Quicksilver, he's gonna take on wheel
Quicksilver, she's a girl for me
In a pool of Mercury...

Quicksilver, she pours, you can jaw
Quicksilver, where do you go man, go
Quicksilver, count for 1, 2, 3
In a pool of Mercury...

She's a girl in a million, }
She's a girl in a billion, } x2
She's a girl in a trillion, }
She's a girl in a tree... }

Quicksilver, headed out for the creed
Quicksilver, this gonna take on wheel
Quicksilver, she's a girl for me
In a pool of Mercury...

Oh, Quicksilver!

Shaving Brush Boogie

("hey, Gregs, pick up the old Les Paul")

Let me tell ya baby
what to do

I'll come round your house
[spunk/spoke/smoke?] in your hair
'cause I'm a moron
and I don't care

Take it down a while

("Enter Terry Chambers on the [little/bloody?] drum kit, 'ere 'ere
[terrificult]. Go bloody boil, Terry . Here he goes Ladies and
Gentlemen - this is something you don't see very often, this is Terry
Chambers from [unintelligible...] on bloody boil.")

I'm going to tell ya about my operation ladies and gentlemen now
I was admitted
into the hospital
yes
and I was admitted to the hospital by an ambulance
with a siren on the top
the siren was going (guitar imitation of siren)
all the way to [the] hospital

(indistinct shouting in background)

You're going to have to turn the drums up now for the bass player
you're going to have to turn the drums up real loud
turn up the drums for the bass player
cause he can't hear to get into this

Take it down a while

("Ahem, ahem")
To resume the story ladies and gentlemen
I was on my way to hospital
and I was in a ambulance
and the driver in the ambulance
turned round to me and he said
(quizzical guitar riff)
yes he turned round to me and he said
(repeat)
he said, "Son, I haven't worked on the, on the Red Cross
just to take people like you with shaving brushes stuff up, stuck up your
rectum to the hospital"
(guitar riff)
"yeah I said stuck up your rectum"
(riff)
"you got a shaving brush" (riff) "shaving brush" (riff)
"you got a shaving brush stuck right up your rectum"
(riff)
"and I, and I didn't join the Red Cross" (riff)
"to take people like you to hospital"
But he said (laughs), he said, he said "I kind of like your face"
(riff) "and I'm going to take you to" (riff)
"I'm going to take you to [Collaston?] Ward, I'm going to take you to
[Collaston] Ward, in Princess Margaret's Hospital"
yeah, it was opened in 1967, ladies and gentlemen

Yeah, we can see Princess Margaret opening this here hospital
okay Princess, open that fucking hospital baby

Okay Princess, let's take it down a while
yeah, huh, yeah

There was Princess Margaret opening a hospital there folks (giggles)
Well in any case, this hospital was opened
back in 1960-something-or-other, by Princess Marguerite
and she's really sweet you know (giggles), she really sucks cock
Princess Margaret going down on a whole damn band
yeah

Any case I was traveling in this ambulance, you know
the one what was going (guitar-siren)
all the way to the hospital, folks, yeah
and I, you know I'd been up to some real extra-marital relationships
with, you know, equipment, like uh, the shaving brush (riff)
(giggles) the shaving brush (riff)
well this was my [outing?]
and I was, I was laid out on the bed
and my brand-new wife
that's the one with the long curly hair,
she said to me "Babe I'm going to give you a real experience
with this here shaving brush" (riff)
and she took it and she stuck it in
(riff) and I... well I liked it but it was only in
having to go to Princess (riff) Margaret's (riff) hospital
baby, baby, baby
Princess Margaret's hospital opened in 1968

(someone else shouts "One, two, three, four!")

Well for all you folks out there the record playing and [...] saga
I [got ?]
I was admitted to the Outpatients Department
and I was well and truly impaled
I said impaled
and they took me to a private booth
yeah a private booth
and a nurse came up to me
and she saw the shaving brush stickin' out
and she leaned over for some -
and she leaned right over a piece of me -
tongs, she leaned over for some tongs
and she took them tongs to the shaving brush
and pulled it out, right out
of me
I said she pulled that shaving brush right out
of me

[Crank it up]

Pupil Haze

from the Drunken Jam Sessions
[transcribed by Brookes McKenzie <RMCKENZI@smith.smith.edu>]

Pupil haze, all through my brain
Lately examination results don't seem the same
Acting rather irksome and I don't know why
Excuse me while I kiss the most attractive pupil in 3-Y

Pupil haze, all through my brain
Lately Matron doesn't seem the same
Acting rather noisom [annoysome?] and I don't know why
Slide into minor, has a fly up his eye

Yes, mark me
I say
I say [it anoints?!]
Oh, mark me
We'll never [....] at this rate

Pupil haze, all through my brain
Lately parents' fees don't seem the same
Acting rather annoying and I don't know why
Excuse me while I cane the entire form of 3-Y

Detain me, O detain me
O, Headmistress -
You're such a buxom [lady], Headmistress
Excuse me while I kiss the dorm
Don't go near that tuck shop
Don't go near that tuck shop

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah

Pupil haze, all through my brain
Lately examination results don't seem the same
Acting jolly funny and I don't know why
I think I'll hold the whole school in detention for a while

Community Worker Breakdown/Whole Lotta Age

("let's do the Troggs tape, let's do the XTC tape")
(someone else: [unintelligible])
(chuckles)
(someone else: "It says 'Communication Breakdown'")
("Oh fuckin oh")
(several people: ["make it up?"])
("Community Worker Breakdown")
(someone else: "go on")

Community worker breakdown
it's just the same
aw you can see too many old people
and their complacence is the same

Community worker breakdown
she can't handle the [?]
everybody's got an explosive natures
and I know what it's [?]

Community worker breakdown
it's just the same
Community worker breakdown
it's driving me insane

Geriatrics on the dole
in their wheelchairs
on [?]
they're wheeling about now
barely alive
they should be all exterminated
'cause they're hardly alive

Community service breakdown
it's a shame
they're serving old people
and these old people haven't got a brain

Community service breakdown
community
there's so many
there's so many fucking geriatrics
they all need to be put into the ground

yeah
baby baby baby baby baby baby baby

yeah
woman

("Shhhhhh, shhhhhh, shhh" - to the band)

Woman
way down inside
Geriatric
you need
ssss, you need so many
leg-irons it's not true
yeah

(wordless yowling)

Old person
deep down inside
you've barely got the strength
to stay alive
why don't you kill yourselves
you'd be so much less fuss
you'd make the earth more space for us

I got a whole load of age
I got a whole load of age

I got a whole load of years
I'm so fucking old
I've got a whole load of age

Way down inside
I've had the operation
I've had me spleen cut out
and an appendectomy
I've had me kidneys removed
and I'm barely alive
I've got mostly National Health Service
going inside

I got a whole load of age
'cause I'm nearly dead
("I've got to hobble with it down to the shed")

("Fucking hell, this is really funky. Hey, let's do the psychedelic bit in
the middle, you cunts." Someone else: "Way down inside," "No, that's the bit
before that, all the cymbals going 'tish tish tish tish'. Come on you
fucking assholes, get this fucking together. Come on, tish tish tish tish,
that's it, yeah - that sort of stuff, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm fucking hot to
trot." Someone else: "I can't fucking begin to [?]." AP laughs rather evilly.
"Come on, yeah, that's it, yeah, I'm good")

Way down yeah

(hocking noise, twice)

Way down inside

(laughs)

(howls like Robert Plant)

Baby baby baby baby baby

Yeah

Shhh, shh, take it down

Way down inside

(someone shouting in background)

Way down inside

("I've got a huge coat on, it's about 4 miles long, it's full of old shit")

([unintelligible])

(someone else: "No, hit me with your rhythm stick!")

("I'm not - my legs aren't that fucking gnarled")

Orange Dust

(someone else: "What fucking number are you going to do? Well, I'd do the
singular one to start with...")

Ow!
What I say, what I say

Well my baby, she said to me
she said, "Baby, I'm going to turn into a tree"
oh my baby, it's all so strange
I think life is just starting to be arranged

She said "This psychedelic rage is a must"
I said "Baby I'm a covered in orange dust"

(chorus in background: "Orange dust! Turn to rust!")

She said "Baby what's happened to me"
She said "All those animals act this way"
she said "Baby why do you feel this way"
I said "I'm going to turn to turn the night into the day"

I said, "This, this sensation is a must
Oh baby I'm covered in orange dust"

(chorus)

([unintelligible])

She said "Baby what's happened to me
I've taken so much I, I think I'm just
yeah, freakin' out"
yay, yay, we're going to freak out baby
you know that's, that's just where it's at
yeah

I'm covered head to foot
covered head to foot in
orange dust

(chorus)

(AP sings unintelligibly in falsetto, sounds like another verse)

oh, freaking out
it's a, out there, you know

Orange Dust Slight Return

("Take it down")

Well-a, well-a
she said to me, "baby"

("D minor")

Yeah

("Back to A minor")

("E minor, D minor")

("Now just go to B-flat minor")

("And start the whole thing again")

A la, la la la la

("This is what Grateful Dead just came, you know this")

("Now up to D minor")

("A minor")

("E minor")

("D minor")

("A minor")

("Up to B minor is what it is")

("Back to A minor")

("Take a solo, Greg")

("D minor")

("A minor")

("and get ready to stop...now")

((whispers) "Yeah. That's freaking cool. I think we should overdub some [?]")

Silver Sewing Machine

(someone else: "let's do another one" "sewing machine")

("Shouldn't we overdub, sort of make the best of this")

I
just made a dress
and it's a hell of a mess
on my sewing machine

(he can't think of any more words, just sings nonsense until he gets to)
...on my sewing machine

And I'm going [dancing?]
I've got a sewing machine
I've got a sewing machine

("Now we ought to do up the others, and Greg's, Greg should...we should
overdub 'em on a real [? vox?] guitar. Come on, I want to hear, I want
to hear the wonder of these tracks.")

Holding the Baby

Holding the Baby
Holding the baby
You've been cut off by your old fun
Holding the baby
Holding the baby
You've been eclipsed by your own son

All over the British Isles
You put your seeds in window boxes
All over the kitchen tiles
You played the hounds to those foxes

Now who will suffer
Now you've been unmasked
Probably the little kid
He was never asked

All over his brand new face
You can see he shouldn't be here
All over at her mum's place
The cozy caress of lust and beer

Now who has to suffer
Now you've been unmasked
Probably the little kid
He was never asked

Pearl

(Recorded by Andy Partridge, live, by himself, on a cheap cassette recorder)
(Imagine a sort of shuffling reggae ballad here)
(Transcribed by John H. Hedges jh3@cencom.net)

Pearl, oh, Pearl
Don't cloister yourself away
Everybody loves a pretty girl
The world's your oyster, come out to play

And you know that you shouldn't wear
Dark clothes anymore
Your heart should be an open book
And not a locked and shuttered store

Pearl, oh Pearl
Don't cloister yourself away
Everybody loves a pretty girl
The world's your oyster come out to play

And you know that shouldn't cry
Those tears anymore
You could wash your love away
And send it sailing out the door

Pearl, oh Pearl
Don't cloister yourself away
Everybody loves a pretty girl
The world's your oyster come out to play

Oh Pearl...

(There's a nice middle bit here...)
(Repeat first verse/chorus)

Monkeys in Human-Skin Suits

(Same recording technique; more of a rocker)
(Transcribed by John H. Hedges jh3@cencom.net)

Monkeys in human-skin suits
Climbing to the top of our institutes
Monkeys in human skin suits
Sitting in the family trees and eating all the best fruits

See them praying people
In the House of Lords
All that fancy play-talk
Sticks in the throat like cocktail swords

Monkeys in human-skin suits
Climbing to the top of our institutes
Monkeys in human skin suits
Sitting in the family trees and picking all the best fruits

(I'm afraid Andy runs out of lyrics here)

Naah na naah naah na naah
It's not my idea
Of that party at all, they're...

Monkeys in human-skin suits...

Raising A Family In A House Full Of Mice

(Moulding)
(transcribed by Annie Sattler, with help from Kim Williams)

A roof above, a baby made from love
A room so small you can hardly get through the door
A place to start our married life
Now I'm your husband, you're my wife
All around us nature having its way

Raising a family in a house full of mice
Birds in the attic, and a bed full of lice
Raising a family in a house full of mice

We sow our seeds, the young we have to feed
A home for three, a wildlife sanctuary
This tiny room has tiny sounds
The company that we have found
All around us nature having its way

Raising a family in a house full of mice
Birds in the attic, and a bed full of lice
Raising a family in a house full of mice

Haven't found warmth for a week or more
Things can't get that much worse
Hate to think what we have in store
Nothing left in our purse

This tiny room has tiny sounds
The company that we have found
All around us nature having its way

Raising a family in a house full of mice
Birds in the attic, and a bed full of lice
Raising a family in a house full of mice

Now We're All Dead (Jacob's Ladder)

(Partridge)
(transcribed by Annie Sattler)

On Jacob's ladder with an angel up my back
He says he never thought that Russia would be first to attack
It doesn't matter, not worth the chatter
It doesn't matter, now we're all dead
Now we're all dead, now we're all all all all all

On Jacob's ladder with an angel up in front
He says America should never put 'em up to such a stunt
It doesn't matter, not worth the chatter
It doesn't matter, now we're all dead
Now we're all dead, now we're all all all all all

On Jacob's ladder, Albert Einstein to my left
I think he's crying at the way we have misused his gift
It doesn't matter, not worth the chatter
It doesn't matter, now we're all dead
Now we're all dead, now we're all dead
Now we all dead, now we all dead

When you get to heaven will you be pardoned?
Do you think he'll shake your hand and say 'thank you'
for spoiling the garden?

On Jacob's ladder with a shopping basket in my hand
Picking the mushrooms that are sprouting up across our green land
It doesn't matter, mad as a hatter
Oh it doesn't matter, now we all dead
Now we're all dead, now we're all all all all all

On Jacob's ladder, [shouldn't be here yet....... steady]
How can we talk to politicians who seem dead already?
It doesn't matter, not worth the chatter
Oh it doesn't matter, now we all dead
Now we're all dead, now we're all all all all all

On Jacob's ladder....
It doesn't matter....
Now we're all dead, now we're all dead...

Susan Revolving

Susan revolving
Down there by the ceiling
Peculiar feeling
High above the ground

Susan revolving
Up there every morning
No four minute warning
Prepares you for the sound

And she's ever going round
Ever turning round and round
Always high below the ground

Susan Revolving
Up there without warning
The whole world is fawning
Right in front of ....

Nicely, Nicely Jane

Nicely, nicely Jane
Wiles away her hours
Nicely, nicely Jane
Cutting heads from flowers
No one knows why she does this
No one knows why she's vague and hazy
Except once she was jilted
And that made the girl a trifle crazy

Nicely, nicely Jane
Wiles away her hours
Nicely, nicely Jane
Cutting heads from flower children

Spare A Penny

(Moulding)
(transcribed by Annie Sattler, with help from Kim Williams)

Spare a penny for the man who fought in two world wars
Spare a penny for the church and the religious cause
I am a generous man, but I'm feeling the pinch
I give you all I can, but you're leaving me skint

Spare a penny for our friends in darkest Africa
Spare a penny for the lands of Viet Nam
I've bought your little gifts, not forgetting your flags
Your poppies of good will just reduce me to rags

I hide in cupboards, under stairs
To save my face from coldest [glare / lead]
My kids are scared to go to school
They're frightened of the money wars

I am a generous man, but I'm feeling the pinch
I give you all I can, but you're leaving me skint

Gangway Electric Guitar

Gangway
Electric
Guitar
Is coming through

She don't care if she hurts
She just lifts up her skirts
And pours down the truth on you

Gangway
Electric
Guitar
Is coming through

Shooting arrows of fire
Through the house of the liar
To bring down the roof on you

When I am weak
She keep me strong
Telling everybody about the church of straightsman

When I'm afraid
She take my hand
There we sit together
And we fight 'em with a love song

Gangway
Electric

Where Did the Ordinary People Go?

(Colin Moulding)
Transcribed by Brookes McKenzie <RMCKENZI@smith.smith.edu>

This street has changed so much
A line of fortresses - look but don't touch
I'd like to call on my neighbors one day
But their Doberman won't look the other way

Chorus:
There's one thing I'd like to know
Where did the ordinary people go?

In my street I don't know a soul
The walls and fences never have no hole
If I could only be your Peeping Tom
You could complain about my bonfire-burning stove

Chorus

Money changes everyone
[There was ?]
There's no community spirit anywhere
[You may say in my green? ... my dream?]

In my street we go by car
The tinted windows never shows who you are
If I could see you, I'd complain about the noise
I can dance across the fence, we might both enjoy

Chorus
(x2)

This street has changed so much...(where did they go?)
This street has changed so much...(those ordinary people?)
This street has changed so much...(where did they go?)
This street has changed so much...(those ordinary people?)

It Didn't Hurt A Bit

(written by Colin Moulding)

[transcribed by Dave O'Connell]

Just a casual thing
Not really worth a mention
Didn't hurt a bit
Didn't hurt a bit

But if you didn't mind
Can we change the subject now?
Didn't hurt a bit
Really didn't hurt a bit

And after all, I'm a man of the world
People come to me 'cause I know the score

And if you see the king
Say I'm a free man
Be sure to tell me it didn't hurt a bit

Just a bit of fun
Didn't alter a thing
Didn't hurt a bit
That's an end to it

In another week
I won't remember the name
But it's all the same
Didn't hurt a bit

My appearance isn't what you surmise
It's just a piece of grape that got in my eye

Whatever you do
Whatever you know
Well I'll put up string (?)
It didn't hurt a bit

Lots of rumours flying 'round
Plans to decieve
It's my word against hers
Who are you going to believe?

Just a casual thing
Not really worth a mention
Didn't hurt a bit
Didn't hurt a bit

But if you didn't mind
Can we change the subject now?
That's an end to it
Really didn't hurt a bit

After all, I'm a man of the world
People come to me 'cause I know the score

Whatever you do
Whatever you say
[song fades out at this point]
Be sure to tell me it didn't hurt a bit

[Colin starts moaning at this point]
Noooooo!
Noooooo!
[then he changes his mind...]
Yeaaaaah!

Then She Appeared

(Demo version)

Then she appeared
Like a note struck from the Liberty Bell
Then she appeared
Like a wish from out of somebody's well
I was a little frightened
Looking with my senses heightened
Cherubim cheered
Then she appeared

And the sun which normally hung
In the clearest summer sky
Suddenly just changed address
And shone from her blue eyes

When she appeared
With a smiling lamb that sat on her lap
When she appeared
With a ?mola? feather stuck in her cap
I was a little dazzled
melting with my senses frazzled
know it sounds weird
then she appeared

Chorus

Then she appeared
Then she appeared

Wonder Annual

Transcribed by Martin Monkman

Hustle, fussle
Push of bustle
So goes the dance of the willing mass

Work, rent, mortgage
Magic shortage
Wacky for milk from their golden ass

Open up your Wonder Annual
Turn all the leaves of your private book
Open up your Wonder Annual
And, if I may, can I lay and look?

At the gold and the silver
That will fly from your hands

Hands of Ripper
Pours paint stripper
Toasting the worms in their shallow graves

Draw your blinds down
Sketch and unfrown
Show me the door through which all are saved

Open up your Wonder Annual
Turn all the leaves to your private book
Open up your Wonder Annual
And, if I may, can I lay and look?

At the shells full of pearls
That will flow from your gate
And if lust equals knowledge
Then I side with the snake

Open up your Wonder Annual
Turn all the leaves to your private book
Open up your Wonder Annual
And, if I may, can I lay and look?

Open up your Wonder Annual
Turn all the leaves to your private book
Open up your Wonder Annual
And, if I may ...

All I Dream Of Is A Friend

(Andy Partridge)
(demo for James and the Giant Peach)

Darkness wraps her gloves
Around my room and lonely bed
Loom of stars will weave a rug
Of thoughts inside my head

I don't dream of cakes and candies
Or to know where fairyland is
There is only one thing you can send
All I dream of is a friend

Clouds like purple boats
Will drift across the heaven's bay
Fast asleep I'll float each night
To find my hidden wish

I don't dream of buried treasure
Or of riches beyond measure
There is only one thing you can send
All I dream of is a friend

Friends are there for you to trust
Friends are there to joke and laugh with
Light a smile when things get tough
To illuminate your path with

I don't dream of magic castles
Or of piles of christmas parcels
There is only one thing you can send
All I dream of is a friend

I don't dream of ice cream canyons
All my thoughts are of companions
There is only one coin you can spend
All I dream of is a friend

Everything'll Be All Right

(Andy Partridge)
(demo for James and the Giant Peach)
(transcribed by Kim Williams <kimw@rice.edu>)

Everything'll be all right
Be all right day and night-time
Everything'll be all right
Be all right now we are all here

If you want to know what the grasshopper thinks
The grasshopper thinks life is jumping
Use your legs Mr. Grasshopper begs
And jump right over the down-in-the-dumps thing
So that...

Everything'll be all right
Be all right day and night-time
Everything'll be all right
Be all right now we are all here

If you want to know what the centipede thinks
The centipede thinks life's for walking
There are no kinks in how the centipede thinks
Just walk yourself away when there is bad luck stalking
So that...

Everything'll be all right
Be all right day and night-time
Everything'll be all right
Be all right now we are all here

If you want to know what the glow-worm thinks
The glow-worm thinks life is shining
The glooms won't grow if you turn on a glow
And knit yourself a jacket with a silver lining
So that...

Everything'll be all right
Be all right day and night-time
Everything'll be all right
Be all right now we are all here

If you want to know what the lady-bug thinks
The lady-bug thinks life has good spots
If the rain comes down push a pencil around
And draw a funny face by simply joining up the big dots
You know...

Everything'll be all right
Be all right, day and night-time
Everything'll be all right
Be all right now we are all here
It's all right now we are all here
It's all right now we are all here!

Don't Let Us Bug Ya

(Andy Partridge)
(demo for James and the Giant Peach)
(transcribed by Kim Williams <kimw@rice.edu> and Jim Zittel)

Don't let us bug ya
Ooh, stop shakin' boy
Unless you want to shake with us
Relax, you ain't breakfast

Don't let us bug ya
We just be having fun
Don't let us bug ya
We won't eat anyone

You may think that you've ridden the bus
And been all around the world
I bet you never seen folks like us
We're enough to make your bald hair curl, man
Enough to make your bald hair curl
So...

Don't let us bug ya
Don't let us bug ya

Don't let us bug ya
Don't mean to wig you out
Don't let us bug ya
Your hair's blown off, no doubt

You may think that there's nothing new
For any little boy or girl
What you see is we're the true
We're enough to make your bald hair curl, man
Enough to make your bald hair curl
So...

Don't let us bug ya
Don't let us bug ya
Enough to make your bald hair curl, man
Enough to make your bald hair curl

Don't let us bug ya
You see we're cool enough
Don't let us bug ya
Just because we got these feelers and stuff

Sure that you heard about "The Ugly Bug Ball"
As sung by Uncle Burl
Rub your eyes with the real thing
We're enough to make your bald hair curl, man
Enough to make your bald hair curl
So...

Don't let us bug ya
Enough to make your bald hair curl, man
Don't let us bug ya
Enough to make your bald hair curl

Just relax, we're not gonna eat you, boy...

The Stinking Rich Song

(Andy Partridge)
(demo for James and the Giant Peach)
(transcribed by Kim Williams <kimw@rice.edu>)

Stinking stinking stinking stinking
Stinking stinking stinking stinking
Stinking stinking stinking stinking rich

Oh what a peach
of an idea, of an idea, it's really a peach
Oh what a peach
of an idea, of an idea, it's really a peach

We can charge admission just to leer
And to peer they'll gladly pay up through the nose you know
And then two millionaires will soon be near
We'll be stinking stinking stinking stinking rich

Oh what a peach
of an idea, of an idea, it's really a peach
Oh what a peach
of an idea, of an idea, it's really a peach

We can set a tent up selling beer
Not just beer there will be ice cream cones and souvenirs
And soon two millionaires we will be near
We'll be stinking stinking stinking stinking rich

Stinking stinking stinking stinking
Stinking stinking stinking stinking
Stinking stinking stinking stinking rich

Oh what a peach
of an idea, of an idea, it's really a peach
Oh what a peach
of an idea, of an idea, it's really a peach

(Left channel)
We can sail to Hollywood, my dear
And, my dear, there will be cameramen and actors needing
Food and drink and we can charge them dear
We'll be stinking stinking stinking stinking rich

(Right channel - sung under the above)
Oh what a peach
of an idea, of an idea, it's really a peach
Oh what a peach
of an idea, of an idea, it's really a peach

(Right channel)
We can charge admission just to leer
And to peer they'll gladly pay up through the nose you know
And then two millionaires we will be near
We'll be stinking stinking stinking stinking rich

(Left channel - sung under above)
Oh what a peach
of an idea, of an idea, it's really a peach
Oh what a peach
of an idea, of an idea, it's really a peach

We'll be stinking stinking stinking stinking rich
We'll be stinking stinking stinking stinking rich
We'll be stinking stinking stinking stinking rich

Your Dictionary

(Transcribed by Jim Zittel, with help from Annie Sattler)

H-A-T-E
Is that how you spell love
In your dictionary
K-I-C-K
Pronounced as kind
F-*-C-K
Is that how you spell friend
In your dictionary
Black on black
A guidebook for the blind

Now that I can see
My eyes won't weep
Now that I can hear
Well your song sounds cheap
Now that I can talk
You'll hear my faith leap
And I'm not so sure
That Joey wed a Virgin Mary
There are no words for me
In your dictionary

S-L-A-P
Is that how you spell kiss
In your dictionary
H-U-R-T
Pronounced as care
S-H-*-T
Is that how you spelt me
In your dictionary
Four-eyed fool
You led 'round everywhere

Now that I can see
It's the queens new clothes
Now that I can hear
For the poison prose
Now that I can talk
With my tongue unfrozen
I'm not so sure
Of santa or the bucked tooth fairy
There are no words for me
In your dictionary

Now your laughter has a hollow ring
But the hollow ring has no finger in it
So let's close the book
And let the day begin
And our marriage be undone

The Green Man

(Andy Partridge)
(transcribed by Steve Schiavo schiavo@airmail.net)

Please to bend down to the one called the Green Man
He wants to make you his Bride
Please to bend down to the one called the Green Man
Forever to him you're tied

And you know for a million years he has been your lover
He'll be a million more
And you know for a million years he has been your lover
Down from the Hills to the Shore

Heed the Green Man
Heed the Green Man

Please to dance round for the one called the Green Man
He wants to make you his Child
Please to dance round for the one called the Green Man
Dressed in the fruits of the Wild

And you know for a million years he has been your Father
He'll be a million more
And you know for a million years he has been your Father
Run to his arms from your door

Lay your head, lay your head, lay your head, lay your head
on the Green Man
Lay your head, lay your head with mine
lay your head, lay your head, lay your head, lay your head
on the Green Man
We'll go bed - Out of Oak and Vine

See the Green Man blow his kiss from high church wall
And unknowing church will amplify his call

Please to bend down for the one called the Green Man
(lyric repeats) (the capitalizations are mine)

Knights in Shining Karma

(Partridge)

Knights in shining karma
Tend your flame
And with love for armor
They'll remain

Ever by your bed
Guarding
Still sleeping
Shield your soul from this reign

Knights in shining karma will remain

Jealous winter sun...
Cold as viochysoisse
Steals your smile for fuel
They'll ignite with brazier light
Of warming stars

Knights in shining karma
Wash your feet
And with sparkless darma come complete

Ever by your sink drying
Up tea tears
Shield your soul from this heat

Knights in shining karma come complete...karma

Swollen summer moon
Hot as boiling air
Puts your dreams to ash
They'll bring sips from restful slumbers
Cooling keg.

Jealous winter sun...

You And The Clouds Will Still Be Beautiful

Transcribed by Joshua Hall-Bachner <particle@servtech.com> and
Dave Gershman <dgershmn@ametsoc.org>

And every morning before I'm awake I walk around the world to make sure
she's alright
And every evening I put the cat out and I stir the sky to make sure it will
spin all night
For I see people who will scratch and spit and kick and fight
And I see nations war about whether right is left and whether wrong is right
And I know storms inside your head can amplify the blight
But no matter what the weather, you and the clouds will still be beautiful
(x2)

And every Troy with a wooden horse I take to peaceful waters but can't make
him drown
And every Bastille that gets stormtroopered, "Hail to the Chief" comes
raining, raining, raining, raining down
I've seen people conduct lightning down to a summer's day
And I see nations playfully hurl snowballs packed with stone and clay
And I know rain inside your head can seriously put a stop to play
But no matter what the weather, you and the clouds will still be beautiful
(x2)

So let it rain

We see flying saucers, flying cups, and flying plates
And as we trip down lover's lane we sometimes bump into the gate
And I know thunder in your head can still reverberate
But no matter what the weather, you and the clouds will still be beautiful
(repeat to end)

So let it rain

We saw flying saucers, flying cups and flying plates
And as we tripped down lover's lane we sometimes bump into the gate
And all that thunder in your head could still reverberate
But no matter what the weather
You And The Clouds Will Still Be Beautiful
But no matter what the weather
You And The Clouds Will Still Be Beautiful

I'd Like That

Transcribed by Joshua Hall-Bachner <particle@servtech.com>

I'd Like That if we could cycle down some lane
I'd like that if we could ride into the rain
Our macks getting wet
I'd be your Albert if you'd be Victoria, hah hah
We'd laugh because each drop would make me grow up
Really high, really high like a really high thing
Say, a sunflower

I'd like that

I'd like that /What would you like?/ if we could lay before my fire
I'd like that /What would you like?/ if you could slide me from this wire
Toasting fork, I'll be done
I wouldn't hector if you'd be Helen of Troy, oh boy
We'd laugh because each flame would make me grow up
Really high, really high like a really high thing
Say, a sunflower

I'd Like that

I'd smile so much my face would crack in two
And you could fix it with your kissing glue
I'd like that
Yes, I'd like that

I'd like that /what would you like?/ if we could float away in bed
I'd like that /what would you like?/ if I could row your heart and head
With you laid on one arm
I'd be your Nelson if you'd be my Hamilton, what fun
We'd laugh because each stroke would make me grow up
Really high, really high like a really high thing
Say, a sunflower (repeats)

/Say a sunflower I became
I'd be growing in your brain/

I'm The Man Who Murdered Love

(written by Andy Partridge)
[transcribed by Dave O'Connell <jumpthecup@aol.com>]

Chorus:
I'm the man who murdered love
Yeah! What do you think to that?
I'm the man who murdered love
Yeah! What do you think to that?

He was begging on his bended knee
For me to put him from his misery
He hadn't worked at all this century
Said 'I do a service for humanity'

(repeat chorus)

Put a bullet in his sugar head
He thanked me kindly, then he lay down dead
Thorny roses blossomed where he bled
And all the cheering angels shook my hand and said...

(repeat chorus)

Oh! Yeah!
Oh! Yeah!
Oh! Yeah!
Oh! Yeah!
What do you think?

There'll be more pain from broken hearts
No more lovers to be torn apart
So don't throw me in your dungeon dark
You're unappealing, putting statues up in every park

(repeat chorus)

So dear public, I'm here to confess
I'm the one who freed us from this mess
Love won't be calling at your address
But what you've never had you'll never miss, I guess

(repeat chorus)

What do you think to that? Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
What do you think to that? Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
What do you think to that? Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
[song begins to fade out at this point, however, an undeterred Andy continues
to yell on...]
What do you think to that? Yeah! Yeah!
What do you think to that? Yeah! Yeah!
What do you think to that? Yeah, I'm the man...

River Of Orchids

Transcribed by Steve Schiavo <schiavo@airmail.net> and
Joshua Hall-Bachner <particle@servtech.com>

Hey!
I heard the dandelions roar in Piccadilly Circus
I heard the dandelions roar in Piccadilly Circus
Take a packet of seeds
Take yourself out to play
I want to see River of Orchids where we had a motorway
Push your car from the road
Push your car from the road
Just like a mad dog you're chasing your tail in a circle
Just like a mad dog you're chasing your tail in a circle
It's all in your back yard
You've the whole world at your feet
I said the grass is always greener when it bursts up through
concrete
Push your car from the road
Push your car from the road
River of Orchids winding our way
Want to walk into London on my hands one day
River of Orchids the road overgrows
Want to walk into London smelling like a beggar rose
Just like a mad dog ... | Yeah! You know you can do it
Just like a mad dog...
I had a dream where the car is reduced to a fossil
I had a dream where the car is reduced to a fossil
Take a packet of seeds
Get yourself out to play
I want to see River of Orchids where we had a motorway
Push your car... | It's all in your back yard...
Push your car... | Take a packet of seeds...
River of Orchids winding my way
Want to walk into London on my hands one day
River of Orchids the road overgrows
Want to walk into London smelling like a Peckham rose
River of Orchids... | I heard the Dandelions...
River of Orchids... | Just like a mad dog...
River of Orchids... | I had a dream...
River of Orchids... | I heard the Dandelions...

Church of Women

[transcribed by Brookes McKenzie <RMCKENZI@smith.smith.edu>]

Lie for a lie, but a truth for the truce

Church of women is made out of milk
which they love turns to butter, -er, -er
Church of women would have you give praise
with a laugh bark and stutter, -er, -er
Like us men like us men they are nothing like us men
Men have gargoyles round their hearts
I'm on my knees but dancing

Want to worship at the church of women
Breathe 'em in until my head goes spinning around
Want to worship at the church,
Let me worship at the church of women

Church of women is making omissions and loving and giving, -ing, -ing
Church of women performing a miracle raising the living, -ing, -ing,
Like us men like us men will they ever like us men?
Men have thorns around their minds
I'm on my mountain preaching

Want to worship at the church of women
Breathe 'em in until my head goes spinning around
Want to worship at the church,
Let me worship at the church of women

Lie for a lie but a truth for the truth
Give 'em back their house - the walls the doors the floors and roof
Stop trying to diet 'em on wafers and wine and admit we're in control
Now let's put things right,
let's multiply the [hugs and] kisses til we have enough to love [any forever]

Want to worship at the church of women
Breathe 'em in until my head goes spinning around
Want to worship at the church,
Let me worship at the church of women
(x4)

Easter Theatre

Transcribed by Keith Hanlon <ad180@seorf.ohiou.edu>,
Joshua Hall-Bachner <particle@servtech.com>,
and Brookes McKenzie <RMCKENZI@smith.smith.edu>

Gold sun rolls around
Chocolate nipple brown
Tumble from your arms
Like the ground your breasts swell
Land awake from sleep
Hares will kick and leap
Flowers climb erect
Smiling from the moist kiss of her rainbow mouth

CHORUS

Stage left
Enter Easter and she's dressed in yellow yolk
Stage right
Now the son has died, the father can be born
Stand up
If we'd all breathe in and blow away the smoke
New life
We'd [uphold] her new life

Golden mounts the tree
Pleads for you and me
Splashing on the lamb
Gamboling with spring's step
Buds will laugh and burst
Racing to be first
Turning all the soil
As the prompter's fingers through her spinning script

CHORUS

Easter ... in her bonnet
Easter ... in her hair
Easter ... are there ribbons?
[Free ties / Eat I'd] everywhere

The Last Balloon

Transcribed by Joshua Hall-Bachner <particle@servtech.com>
and Brookes McKenzie <RMCKENZI@smith.smith.edu>

The Last Balloon is leaving
The last balloon from fear
The last balloon is leaving
Form that line right here

Climb aboard, climb aboard you menfolk
You won't need any bombs or knives
Climb aboard, climb aboard you menfolk
Leave 'em there, to your former lives

Drop it all

The last balloon is leaving
The last balloon of all
The last balloon is leaving
Undress, discard, let fall

Climb aboard, climb aboard you women
You won't need any gems or furs
Climb aboard, climb aboard you women
Leave all that to the bad old years

Drop it all

The last balloon is leaving
The last balloon they'll fly
The last balloon is leaving
And we won't qualify

Climb aboard, climb aboard you children
Move aloft, while your feet (?) fast
Climb aboard, climb aboard you children
World right down, by our revoked pass

Drop us all, you should drop us all
drop us all, free your head
drop us all, drop us all,
drop us all like so much sand

Dame Fortune

(Andy Partridge)
Transcribed by Brookes McKenzie <RMCKENZI@smith.smith.edu>

Dame Fortune smile, ring my bell, lift your skirt
Pour [some?] fortune on me
Dame Fortune smile, knock my door, doff your cap
Deliver milk for my tea

I've been throwing low numbers on the dice of life
All the cards I turn scowl at me like my ex-wife
When night-time falls I'll need your net
To catch those brick-bats in

Dame Fortune smile at my lottery [lass?]
Please won't you empty my bin?
C'mon!
(muttered: "Play the guitar")

Dame Fortune smile, tear a square from your dress
Give my front windows a clean
Dame Fortune let me borrow your bike
Bring home the bacon and beans

I've been drawing low numbers from the hat of dreams
Drowning in the pools by simply picking rotten teams
When night-time falls we'll fix it up
I'll loan your safety pin

Dame Fortune smile when they're spitting at me
Please bring all my washing in

I Can't Own Her

Transcribed by Joshua Hall-Bachner <particle@servtech.com>

And I may as well wish for the moon in hand

I own this (winter)
I own this (town)
All of the (climate)
And it's wine all sliding down

But I can't own her
And I never will
No I can't own her
And that's a bitter pill
Taken with rain
'Til the gutter shines like the swirling sky
Like the swirling sky

I've got all morning
I've got all year
It's down in my pocket
In the daylight from the (?)

But I can't own her
And I never will
No I can't own her
And that's a bitter pill
Taken with rain
How I'd wash her hair like the swirling sky
Like the swirling sky

And when I say I can't own her
I don't mean to buy her
It's nothing at all to do with money
I merely want her in my arms
Forever more. Is that an odd request?
Is that something so funny?

And I may as well wish for the moon in hand
As this poor chance of love from a (true)

But I can't own her
And I never will
No I can't own her
And that's a bitter pill

Of all the things you've got
The thing you want the most
Is there, and she's the one thing that you just can't have

Of all the things you've got
The thing you want the most
Is there, and she's the one thing that you just can't have

But I can't own her
And I never will
No I can't own her
And that's a bitter pill
Taken with rain
Which I swallow down with the swirling sky
Like the swirling sky

And I can't own her
And I may as well wish for the moon in hand