The Last LaughIn Plane English |  |
David Coleman is an English sports commentator famous for putting his foot in it and for his slips of the tongue. He also cannot commentate on a race, that includes a British athlete without almost bursting into tears.
"And here comes Sally Gunnell (or whoever), she's well and truely inside her own British record ........................... what a brilliant run this really is! ................ the British athlete, being lapped now for the fifth time"
These days the description "Colemanballs" extends to include all commentators, and to our great surprise, most of them are football related, so start chewing your bubble gum and we'll kick off with one or two shots off target from the great man himself.
"It's a great advantage to be able to hurdle with both legs" "And with an alphabetical irony, Nigeria follows New Zealand" "Her time ... about 4:13, which she is capable of" "The next race starts in 10 minutes, that's our time of course" "Moses Kiptanui - the 19 year old Kenyan, who turned 20 a few weeks ago"
"That's great, tell him he's Pele and get him back on"John Lambie - Partick Thistle manager, when told a concussed striker did not know who he was.
"I never comment on referees and I'm not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat"Ron Atkinson - Former football manager and TV commentator.
"The crowd think that Todd handled the ball ... they must have seen something nobody else did"Barry Davies - Football commentator.
"And the news from Guadalajara where the temperature is 96 degrees, is that Falcao is warming up"Brian Moore - Football commentator.
"I'm going to make a prediction - it could go either way"Ron Atkinson
"This is really a lovely little horse, I once rode her mother"Ted Walsh - Former jockey and now Racing Commentator.
"They had a dozen corners, maybe 12 ... I'm guessing"Craig Brown - Scottish football manager.
"That was Pele's strength - holding people off with his arm"Ron Atkinson
"My heart goes out to Graeme Souness"Brian Clough, as the then Liverpool Manager recovered from bypass surgery.
"Disappointing news for Beethoven, as his 9th Symphony drops
9 places in our hall of fame"Jamie Crick- Classic FM presenter.
"That's cricket Harry, you get these sort of things in boxing"Frank Bruno - Boxer.
"And somewhat surprisingly, Cambridge have won the toss"Harry Carpenter - TV commentator.
"I couldn't settle in Italy - it was like living in a foreign country"Ian Rush - Liverpool footballer.
"Just under 10 seconds for Nigel Mansell. Call it 9.5 seconds in round numbers"Murray Walker - Motor racing commentator.
"It was a game we should have won. We lost it because we thought
we were going to win it. But then again, I thought that there was no way we were going to
get a result there"Jack Charlton - Football manager.
"He dribbles a lot and the opposition don't like it - you can see it
all over their faces"Ron Atkinson
"Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious"Alan Minter - Boxer.
"If we played like this every week, we wouldn't be so inconsistant"Bryan Robson (1990).
"And he's got the icepack on his groin there, so possibly not the old
shoulder injury"Ray French - Sky TV Rugby.
"Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air
for even longer"David Acfield.
"I would not say that he (David Ginola) is the best winger in the
Premiership, but there are none better"Ron Atkinson
"I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have
was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with these people".J. Danworth Quayle.
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