-Spew-

Have you ever wanted to write unbelievably pretentious poetry, to amaze and impress your friends with totally incomprehensible yet profound sounding drivel?

Do you ever wish that you could spout meaningless rubbish, and make everyone think that you must be so much more clever than them, because they just don't have a CLUE what you're on about?

Well, now you CAN! As a result of many years of dedicated research, and one of those fortuitous accidents involving strange stuff of EXTRATERRESTRIAL ORIGIN, We can now bring you SPEW.

SPEW makes use of the very latest discoveries in the field of Artificial Unintelligence, involving DISASTER THEORY (which is like Chaos Theory, but far more destructive), and lots of Very Hard Sums.

What the Critics say...
"Fresh and disconcerting use of symbolism and metaphor. The strange and unnerving juxtaposition of non-linear syntactical constructs within the framework of a regular yet occasionally shocking leitmotif recalls the cadences explored by Burroughs and Joyce. A talent to be watched". - Postmodern Poetry Review

" Mmmm... Like... ?... Feel it, Man... It's there.... Totally... With the... Uh... Like... ?... !... Wha!... I hear it... Smooth, Cats...". - The Beatnik

"Look, is this some kind of a joke? If you don't stop sending us this junk you'll be hearing from our attorneys". - Reader's Digest

If you have an Amiga, Download Spew.lha (.lha archive: 8542 bytes)

If you have a PC, Download SPEW.ZIP (.zip archive: 9216 bytes)

If you have a Mac, you don't need SPEW. You can probably come out with stuff like this already.

SPEW contains portions of code which are the copyrighted property of the people I ripped them off from. This may include portions of code from Windows95, I ain't saying. I accept no responsibility for any damage arising as a result of using SPEW, including, but not limited to winning major literary awards and/or being mistaken for a beatnik and beaten to death by street mime artists. It is recommended that for maximum enjoyment SPEW is used after a sustained period of sleep deprivation. May cause hair loss in some individuals.

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